When I feel like this (and I have the energy) I make myself get ready. Shower, wash my hair, curl it, put on makeup and get out, even if it’s just a supermarket.
Oh that mean girl. She barged into my head this morning, the bitch.
She went off about how useless my writing is and made fun of the whole “Ima blogger” thing. And then, “come on honey. If you were any good more people would subscribe, right? It’s not rocket science. I’m not saying anything you don’t already know. You Baby. “
Then she said, “oh wait, you’re a painter, too, right!?” Then she started laughing and rolling around on the floor and pointing at me. “Pathetic!” “Look at me I’m a nearly 57 year old without a career!”
She’s tough. But then I shove her in the solar plexus and tell her to get lost! Then I forget what I was doing in the first place and why I’m standing there. Huh. Was upset? Why?
Totally LOVED the suggestion to be curious about what has happened to “our mean girl”!! I will definitely reflect on that!! This was so helpful as someone working in therapy on self- compassion. This resonates so much more as it touched me internally. I keep telling my therapist that I can say the right stuff but I don’t “feel” it. These suggestions I really do feel!!
I love that this resonated with you, Vanessa! Like every story's main character, you don't gain a flaw without a wound. This means that every mean girl has a wound and deserves compassion. Locating the wound might take some time, but it's worth digging.
I always told my kids to talk to themselves as if they were talking to a friend. If you wouldn't say it to a friend, don't say it to yourself. Of course, sometimes easier said than done.
Thank you for sharing my post Lisa-Marie. We must be channeling the same desire to heal right now because my piece coming out today is something I consider an excellent antidote to the mean girl. I also wonder if you've ever heard of Existential Kink, by Carolyn Elliot? It's a fun and unique take on shadow work, which, for those who are unfamiliar, is simply a means by which to integrate the parts of ourselves we don't like to acknowledge the existence of, including self-hatred. It's my favorite way to tackle my triggers and negative self-talk, and might be useful to you or your readers.
Thank you for making me feel so seen with this piece!
When I feel like this (and I have the energy) I make myself get ready. Shower, wash my hair, curl it, put on makeup and get out, even if it’s just a supermarket.
Great suggestions, Leonora.
Girl training includes learning to be mean to ourselves. Pre-empting the meanness from outside, saying it before someone else gets the chance.
Very true and very sad. We need to fix that.
Oh that mean girl. She barged into my head this morning, the bitch.
She went off about how useless my writing is and made fun of the whole “Ima blogger” thing. And then, “come on honey. If you were any good more people would subscribe, right? It’s not rocket science. I’m not saying anything you don’t already know. You Baby. “
Then she said, “oh wait, you’re a painter, too, right!?” Then she started laughing and rolling around on the floor and pointing at me. “Pathetic!” “Look at me I’m a nearly 57 year old without a career!”
She’s tough. But then I shove her in the solar plexus and tell her to get lost! Then I forget what I was doing in the first place and why I’m standing there. Huh. Was upset? Why?
Sounds like a menopausal mean girl. 😂
I know!
Totally LOVED the suggestion to be curious about what has happened to “our mean girl”!! I will definitely reflect on that!! This was so helpful as someone working in therapy on self- compassion. This resonates so much more as it touched me internally. I keep telling my therapist that I can say the right stuff but I don’t “feel” it. These suggestions I really do feel!!
I love that this resonated with you, Vanessa! Like every story's main character, you don't gain a flaw without a wound. This means that every mean girl has a wound and deserves compassion. Locating the wound might take some time, but it's worth digging.
I always told my kids to talk to themselves as if they were talking to a friend. If you wouldn't say it to a friend, don't say it to yourself. Of course, sometimes easier said than done.
This is brilliant advice that I wish I had given to my daughter when she was little.
Can’t say mine always followed it! But I tried.
Thank you for sharing my post Lisa-Marie. We must be channeling the same desire to heal right now because my piece coming out today is something I consider an excellent antidote to the mean girl. I also wonder if you've ever heard of Existential Kink, by Carolyn Elliot? It's a fun and unique take on shadow work, which, for those who are unfamiliar, is simply a means by which to integrate the parts of ourselves we don't like to acknowledge the existence of, including self-hatred. It's my favorite way to tackle my triggers and negative self-talk, and might be useful to you or your readers.
Thank you for making me feel so seen with this piece!
Thanks so much for the suggestion, Jennie! I don't know the book, but will add it to my list. Looking forward to your piece today.