Your struggle with who to invite reminds me of a story in Priya Parker's book - The Art of Gathering. She talks about a woman who is celebrating a birthday (80th?) and decides to just invite her direct immediate descendants - no spouses, no kids. Everyone is outraged. And then the ones who go to the party have a moment to connect with brothers/sisters/cousins as they did when they were kids, and it becomes an intimate and really nostalgic experience.
Having the courage to define those spaces and experiences is not for the faint hearted!
I’ve lived this pattern in my own way. It was brutal.
What surprised me was that it didn’t change through insight or effort.
As the underlying nervous system imprints resolved, the pattern itself fell away.
The self-doubt went with it. And expressing my needs stopped feeling like something I had to work up to.
I’m not there yet, Stephanie. But hoping!
Your struggle with who to invite reminds me of a story in Priya Parker's book - The Art of Gathering. She talks about a woman who is celebrating a birthday (80th?) and decides to just invite her direct immediate descendants - no spouses, no kids. Everyone is outraged. And then the ones who go to the party have a moment to connect with brothers/sisters/cousins as they did when they were kids, and it becomes an intimate and really nostalgic experience.
Having the courage to define those spaces and experiences is not for the faint hearted!
Let’s hope my boundary proves as successful.
I hope so. Those transitions are so important.