An Easy Way to Plot a Mucky Middle Adventure

Or... Choose the soft-serve, honey! Sorbet sucks!

*The post photo is a shameless attempt to lure you in with our Covid foster cat, Jimmy. Hey, he’s lying on a bench, and I have mentioned a bench in this post.

Do you ever feel like your life is stuck in a monotonous loop, where each day is a carbon copy of the last?

It’s as if there's an author out there who wrote your life story, and they've screwed up the plot?

Life is drudgery when it's only a series of "and thens."

Before the day I found myself leaping from the tailgate of a sinking car onto the edge of a steep, icy embankment, my life was a series of "and thens".

You know how it goes.

I woke up in the morning, and then I got showered and dressed, and then I got the baby up and fed and dressed, and then I made my husband his packed lunch, and then I dropped the baby at daycare, and then I drove an hour and a half to work, and then I worked all day in a cubicle, and then I drove home and hour and a half, and then I picked the baby up at daycare, and then I tried to squeeze in quality baby time (which I desperately wanted), and then I made dinner, and then I put the baby to bed, and then I sat down with a glass of wine, and then I listened to my husband complain about his work, and then I went to bed, and then, I did it all over again.

I didn't know I needed to hire a new author to handle my story, and I certainly didn't expect it to be me.

You see, my heroine, every good story needs change and a dash of conflict. Humanity thrives on the excitement and growth of navigating challenges and making deliberate decisions. Without change or conflict, you don't have a story. You only have a snooze-worthy list of things happening. It's like hopping onto the C train by mistake only to realize you're on a snail-paced, tedious tour of every single local stop. You've missed the A train express ride to JFK and your next adventure.

The issue isn’t what’s happening but HOW it's happening. Most budding authors know the start and end of a story but get confused and stymied when attempting to craft the middle.

Are you lost in your mucky middle?

Have you strung together events with the words “and then” and turned your thrilling tale into a laundry list?

The structure of a story holds countless secrets we can use to improve our lives (we dig through them all to find our extraordinary lives in The Heroine's Adventure). If I were an author writing a story, and I wanted that story to change the main character, as well as excite and thrill outside observers, I would banish all those "and thens" and replace them with "buts" and "therefores."

This tiny tweak can revolutionize your narrative, but especially your life. The best stories aren't told; they're experienced.

Don't you want to shake up your mucky middle?

Let's rewind the tape and reimagine my life before that icy plunge into enlightenment...

I woke up in the morning, but before I got showered and dressed, I carved out an hour to play with the baby. Therefore, my husband would get up an hour early to feed and dress the baby while I got ready for work. But, less time also meant I couldn't make my husband's lunch. Therefore, we made a deal to spend a few hours every Sunday afternoon batch cooking and make it a fun event for the family. But, I was still unhappy with the length of my commute. Therefore, we carved out time for me to look for a job closer to home, giving me more time with the baby. But, my husband was still unhappy with his job and I realized I was unhappy with my husband, therefore, we made plans to attend counseling together. Etc...

Now, it's true, maybe you don't want a roller coaster of a life. Maybe you want a nice and easy stroll in the park. But ladies, does the park have to be so dull?

Check this out...

I went to the park, and then I walked my usual route, and then I sat on a bench to rest, and then I went home.

Or it could be...

I went to the park, but I started at Strawberry Fields. Therefore, I stood and listened to a hippie playing a hauntingly beautiful version of "Give Peace a Chance." But I noticed an ice cream van just off my usual route. Therefore, I treated myself to an enormous soft-serve. But the bench I usually sit on was full. Therefore, I walked while I ate my ice cream, but it was melting. Therefore, I called over a dog named Buster, whose owner took a photo of him licking soft-serve from my fingertips.

We stick to the "and then" life because it's easy, familiar, and doesn't challenge our status quo. But just as we do in stories, in life, we crave tension, surprise, and resolution, even if it's only during a gentle walk in the park.

I need to scream from the rooftops here... There's obviously nothing wrong with wanting a quiet, familiar, comfortable life. For many of you, that is the perfect extraordinary life.

But, you can still live a comfortable life infused with the authorly/readerly satisfaction of conflict and resolution by focusing on making choices. Maybe your conflict is whether you should have a soft-serve or sorbet, or maybe you can't sit on the bench you usually do, so you have to choose somewhere else. Therefore, you will add interest, engagement, and a little more spark to your life. (See what I did there?)

Picture you, the main character, on the edge of your seat. You are totally and completely engaged in even the tiniest moments of your gorgeous existence and always hungry for the next twist. All because you dared to embrace conflict and resolution and began authoring your own epic adventure.

I'm not advocating barrage fireworks here (although I am cheering you on if you want to burst like a phoenix into the night sky). I'm only suggesting you consider lighting a sparkler every once in a while.

And you don't even need to have a near-death experience!

JOURNAL PROMPT:

List the events of yesterday or your plan for today. Where do you see a cluster of "and thens"? Introduce a conflict or a choice by inserting the word "but." What can you throw in your path today to wake yourself up, add some pizazz, or yank you out of your mucky middle? What might have happened if you had lived that "but" yesterday? What happens after the "buts" you’ve inserted today? Is your life a little more interesting? A little more in your control? A little more extraordinary? A little more "yours"?

If you enjoyed this post, please help others hear the Call for Heroines by liking or commenting below. You’d be my favorite!